Toxins 101

"So, what are the benefits of getting a massage?" she asked. I reeled off a list, ending with "and drink lots of fluids afterwards to help flush out the toxins that are released." To which she responded: "what exactly do you mean, toxins?" I found myself struggling for an accurate medical answer, especially since I have a very holistic view of the term.

After many days considering the question, I present to you, Toxins 101:

When one is confronted with difficult emotional issues, coping behavior can include overeating, junk eating, drinking, drugging, or shopping. Each of these coping behaviours creates a form of toxin within our bodies. How, you ask? In detail:

1. You have an un-resolved issue that you are angry about.
   
2. Intstead of dealing with the issue, you consume toxins (food/drink/stuff).
   
3. The consumption behavior helps you to numb and ignore the real issue.
   
4. The toxin binds with the emotional issue.
   
5. The toxin and the related issue are converted to fat, which is deep storage energy for the body.
   
6. Through either vigorous massage or vigorous exercise, those deep fat/emotional stores can be broken down, re-entering the lymphatic system and bloodstream as toxins.
   
7. When they enter the bloodstream, the original stored issue is re-released into the body, often causing unexpected emotional outbursts (crying while running, for instance)
   
8. This, then, is the path of the toxin: imbibed, converted, stored, and released.
   

You might ask, "how does shopping create toxins?" To which I respond: As above, so below. Or via the Greeks: the macrocosm (the universe) mirrors the microcosm (the self). In otherwords, when you purchase/acquire un-needed excess and place it in your environment (clutter), your physical body responds in an equal manner (toxin). The same for junk food.

On a personal note, I've also recently re-committed myself to sobriety; this radical step is really gifting me some laser focus on how these issues manifest in my own body. Sobriety is forcing me to confront my feelings and to create action around them, even when the tasks are emotionally challenging. But just like exercise, it sure feels better on the other side! :)

Flying on the Wings of Yoga

Vairagya (detachment) and Abhyasa (practice) are oft cited as the "wings of yoga."

They act as complementary forces in our lives. Let's say we are trying to accomplish a goal, such as wishing to be able to touch our toes in a forward bend. Or perhaps we have a loftier goal, like learning to fly. The wings of yoga instruct us to:

a) determine to make a daily abhyasa (practice) to move us gently and solidly towards our goal, and

b) embody a state of vairagya (detachment) so that we release all concerns about ever achieving the goal, accepting whatever gifts we find along the path and embracing the present moment.

Humans who are too fixated on accomplishing a task inherently damage the result by being too dependent upon it. At the same time, like the tortoise and the hare, it is the solid and consistent dedication, one day at a time, that eventually brings us to the destination which we have envisioned.

So, in your goal setting, be determined and disciplined, and hold yourself accountable to move yourself some small amount in your intended direction every day. At the same time, detach yourself from all neediness and obsession with actually achieving your goal. Accept the natural flow of life, breath, and take joy in the gifts of the journey.

Namaste. Namaskar. Smiles :)

Intentions are the Ingredients of your Reality

I had a wondrous dream last night where the meta of life was revealed.

Every intention we set, every dream we hold on to so tightly, every material object we cherish or desire or obsess about, every experience we choose to participate in, every destination we choose to travel to... each of these things is an essential ingredient of the reality we chose to actively create.

In other words, the greater reality of the universe is a manifestation of the energies we choose to focus. These energies can be categorized as:

• intentions (present motivations)
  
• hopes, dreams and aspirations (future plans)
• people we choose to share energy / conversation / food / love with
• places we choose to visit
  
• cherished material things (objects which we infuse with meaning, i.e. clothes, cars, toys)
• collected memories which we choose to share as stories (meme propagation)

Your life can be viewed clearly through the lens of these raw ingredients.

The question is, now that you have this wisdom, what Universe are you choosing to create?

chance and symbolism

Everything for a reason, everything with a purpose.

The other night I had a particularly depressing time on the town. The beginning of the 4th of July, around 1am. I got so flustered that I changed my dinner order to take-out, and sat there debating whether to pay cash or credit. I counted my cash and put my card on the table. Finally went with cash. And I was so done, that I just left the cash on the table (in Mew York City!), walked to the front desk, and told the waitress "I left it on the table" as I fled the scene of the crime.

he next morning I counted my cash. Something like $75 total, about $20 of that in 1s. I couldn't find my ATM card but didn't think much of it... until I had spent almost all my cash on a new pair of shoes, a new shirt, 2 slices of pizza and a drink. I had $8 left. And spent 30 minutes searching for my ATM card in vain.

I made it through the night through the kindness of strangers. The club gate girl who slipped me in, the girl who bought me bottled water.

Come the next morning, I had a single $2 bill and began to strategize how I might transform that and a metro card into a passage to the airport the next morning. It felt like Burning Man all over again, in a way.

Anyways, waltzed over to the restaurant, and asked the maitre de about a lost card. She was super sweet, checked the office, asked the bartender, even called the manager. No luck. I told the bartender "I lost my green card." He said "That sucks." And I replied, "Good News, Bad News... Who knows?"

Back to the homestead all 35 feet south, a renewed effort to find my card. It *will be* here. I *will* find it. A mere five minutes later:

bending three magazines (with a sneaking suspiscion), I sense something rigid inside one of them. Hmmmm... I grab them by their spines and shake. Low and behold, what falls out of, but my little green ATM card. Right behind the flap of "quiet your mind... 5 poses for inner calm," followed closely by "Transform your life with yoga of the heart"

This was a powerful message atop the Ram Dass Be Here Now, and Bhaghavan Dass' It's Here Now (Are You?) reading of the night prior. Slowly, but surely, a picture is forming...

How to Fly

Just had the most incredible yoga / flying dream ever. It was a deep profound vision. In it, Deven and I and some of the AcroNYC crew were in central park meditating in lotus position. Strong strong strong winds whipped up. Tornado force winds. We extended our arms and our bodies became like sails. The wind lifted us up and into the air. With ever so subtle (and some not so subtle) gestures, we were able to "reap the wild wind" and navigate through the storm, using nature's power as our flying power.

It took genuine courage to do this. In fact, we time / space shifted a bit between central park and the playa, as significant dust storms kicked up with the force of the wind. I found we could both breathe and see in the dust without irritation; it simply took willpower and faith.

This dream was such a powerful vision and yet I find I have no more words for it. I awoke excited and aware and awake, my heart beating fast in a purely passionate and pleasureable way.

In 10 hours I will be in Central Park (in real life) playing Acro with my new flying friends. May all our dreams come true!

More Yogic Guidance

The intensity and longing in romantic love creates a powerful fire in the heart.

When that fire is turned inward and directed toward God or toward the Inner Self, then it can transform our character, open our inner heart, and move us into great depths of surrender and adoration.

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Depths, eh?

I have had several dreams so far about my NYC experience that lead me to believe that this is, in actuality, a trip deep down into the wells of my unconscious being. Multiple dreams about being deep deep deep underwater, swimming, light filtering in from high above.
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And more:

There are two paths to dealing with wild and potentially reckless romantic love.

The first is discipline and renunciation, a detachment from the feelings. (Ugh.)

The second originates from the ancient Yogic philosophy known as Tantra. Tantra asks you to focus on the feelings behind the fantasies -- the pure feeling of longing for love that we all possess. This longing is activated by our connection to another person, yet it is much larger than that individual. When we find the inner feeling and follow it, the longing can lead us towards Essence itself.

This second path moves us into and through the fantasy to the longing at its core. By attending to the call of your deepest desire, you can transform your fantasies into pointers rather than ends in themselves.

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I sure hope the second path works. I'm betting my life on it.

Yogic advice for Troubled Times

Your story about an experience can both define and direct your emotional response. The way you choose to interpret things will deeply effect the future of that encounter, or the future relationship with that person.

But when you put the story aside, emotions are simply emotions. At the heart of all these emotions is energy itself. Love is a particular kind of energy. Sadness is another. Anger is another. Each of these emotions has a characteristic felt sense -- for anger, a hardness of the heart or the gut; for love, a melting, rippling heat in the heart; and for sadness, a sinking, heavy feeling through the chest.

In times of upheaval one of the most powerful things that you can do is to practice catching each wave of emotion as a felt sense in the body, without acting on it or attaching to it. This is a kind of meditation practice; you keep bringing your attention to the sensation of the emotion in your body, just as you would bring your attention back to the breath again and again. You sit in the felt sense as long as you can, noticing the stories and thoughts that arise, constantly bringing attention back to the present moment and to the feeling of the emotion in your body.

As you do this, the feeling will begin to change. It might dissipate, or it might just lead to a different series of feelings. It's in that gesture of learning to be with emotions as sensation and energy, and then letting the shift, that you will begin to realise the path you are meant to follow.

-- excerpted from Yoga Journal, Feb 2008

Weave Death

Well, this was inevitable. And now I progress to the greater evolution of this precious flow art.

My weave dance is about over. This, because I shot a video of it. And I looked at it without seeing the poi. And all I could see was a hunched over person focusing all energy internally, hands tied together and staying close to body core.

I didn't want my dance to look like that. I want it to be free and expressive and OPEN. I began to really move my arms and hands OUT from my body, stretching to maximum extension and re-discovering those BASIC poi moves. It felt good. For the first time in a while, I got the good ole spine tingle... for me, that means I'm opening up new energy channels. Yay!

The FINAL nail in the coffin was when I realised that my "tight weave" manuever could be best explained by saying "pretend like you have handcuffs on"... I did subsequently confirm that I can do forward / backward / spinning weave while handcuffed, but was that really the dance I wanted to be putting out into the universe?

So, farewell continuous weave, hello OPEN SPINNING.

With Open Heart Forward,
+h30ry

Natural Movement

after another 30 minutes of spinning to some of my favorite spinmusic (Prodigy: Breath, Fighting Cocks misc, various Burning Man DJ set rips), I have both integrated the weave, both directions, and had some good practice moving into and out of it from other places.

I can truly say this is the most natural move I've ever assimilated. After the first few "watch the video" disasters, I gave up on it, and then "voila!" at the beach, it simply materialised out of thin air, and now its like second nature.

I hope that all moves come so easily in the future!